Just rolled back from Dali! This cliff hotel almost made my kid jump into the sea

Ladies!! Bravely took my 6-year-old to explore Liuyue·Hai Dongfang
Now looking at our own bay window feels like a doghouse, who understands!!
(Attached is a bankruptcy-level bill for three days and two nights + soul-shattering experience)🏨

🌊 The cliff pool turned the whole family into geckos!!
Promised Mediterranean style breathtaking beauty
But the kid stepped on a cactus wanting to "swim to Cangshan"
The lifeguard chased with a megaphone: "That's a decorative tree! Fake!"🌵
(Suggest a 24-hour leash to prevent getting lost! The Erhai Lake is so blue it makes you want to jump in)

🛏️ The sea view room turned into an Ultraman battlefield!!
Floor-to-ceiling windows like Yang Yang’s, picturesque
But the kid scattered minibar chips all over the bed
Holding a Dyson hairdryer shouting "This is the light gun to defeat monsters"💥
(Lock the snack cabinet! Free instant noodles are more attractive than mom)

📸 The spiral staircase instantly turned mom into Spider-Man!!
The white spiral staircase is as beautiful as a wedding dress base
But the kid insisted on performing a "high-altitude slide" on the handrail
The housekeeper laughed to tears: "Today the ninth stair athlete was born!"🤸
(Prepare five lollipops! The popular photo spot line is scarier than Spring Festival travel rush)

🍴 The cliff restaurant caused international social embarrassment!!
Fusion cuisine Yang Yang has eaten twice
The kid spilled truffle steamed chicken into an "Erhai Lake map"
French tourists snapped photos wildly: "This is true performance art!"🍲
(Bring bibs! Soup stains on white T-shirts are more noticeable than tattoos)

Now all sea view homestays look like farmhouses
But honestly—
Lying on the infinity water terrace watching Cangshan swallow clouds is unforgettable forever!!
(Final warning: Apply three pounds of sunscreen! The plateau UV rays can turn you into jerky in minutes)

🗺️ Life-saving itinerary:
Day 1: Drive straight to Hai Dongfang villa area (set navigation strictly!) → bribe the kid with ice cream for a family photo → play "Octonauts" role-play in the pool → coax to sleep with "Yang Yang set meal" at the cliff restaurant💤
Day 2: Shoot a "Santorini" bankruptcy version at Ideal State → chase rainbows on Wenbi Village road → trick the kid back with "Ultraman is waiting for you at the hotel"🦸
Day 3: Lounge and edit photos at the hotel café → crowded Shuanglang ancient town → end the trip with maltose kite🎈

💡 Hidden Easter egg: International socializing spotted in the villa area!!
A Sino-French mixed kid taught mine dinosaur dance in sign language
The cleaning lady laughed holding the wall: "This is better than the Spring Festival Gala skits!"🦖
(Bring bubble guns! Cross-national friendship connects faster than Wi-Fi)

⚠️ Blood and tears advice:
1️⃣ The demon wind in Haidong Town can blow off fake eyelashes, hairspray turns into steel bars
2️⃣ Don’t rent white cars for self-driving! Red dirt roads dust them into vintage models in minutes
3️⃣ Hot spring bath gift sets will be used as water bombs by kids, lock them in the safe
4️⃣ The hotel cacti thorns are as fierce as the strict nanny, scan your whole body before cuddling the kid

🌈 Ultimate experience:
✅ Standing at the cliff edge when morning mist rolls over feels like the end of the world
✅ Understanding why Yang Yang revisited when noon sunlight floods the floor-to-ceiling window
✅ Playing "Go to Dali" on the Bluetooth speaker at midnight, the kid howls like a ghost
✅ At some moment, truly believing "Descendants of the Sun" was filmed here☀️

🍜 Foodie alert:
✅ Afternoon tea cakes were hijacked by seagulls three times before we could eat
✅ Hidden mushroom hotpot requires cuteness to unlock from the chef
✅ Breakfast rice noodles made the Hunan kid cry spicy, yogurt saved the day and became a lifesaver
(Finally: bring montmorillonite powder! Plateau yogurt might open a new world door🚪)